Yesterday, when we were folding laundry in my bedroom, I kicked a pair of pants that have been laying in the same spot for 3 days waiting for me to move it to the “Goodwill” box. Out ran one of those big nasty tree roaches! Yep – that big one right there! Does the photo gross you out? I hate them. I hate them with a passion. They are so nasty! AND THEY FLY!!!!!! GROSS, GROSS, GROSS!!

Ok but that is not the worst part. The worst part is that when it ran out of the pants that were on my floor, it ran UNDER my bed. Which of course, is not clean. There are folded blankets, a big sleeping bag, various backpacks, you know…clutter that I don’t know what to do with. I’m CERTAIN that that roach ran under my bed and into that big sleeping bag.

When Royce got home from work we told him about the problem and and “checked it out for me” and couldn’t find the roach. I can’t tell you how much this disturbs me. I had to leave to go run some errands last night and then meet Friend for coffee – which took my mind off my roach problem for several hours – but last night, when the coffee finally did wear off (around 1:30am) I had to force myself to get into the bed! I had the hardest time falling asleep – see I was SURE that roach had crawled on top of the sleeping bag, onto my bed frame, up the side of the skirt and into the bedding and was WAITING FOR ME. OR, worse, it would crawl up the front of the bed while I’m sleeping and I’d wake up feeling it crawl across my face!

My anxiety over this problem was so bad that I actually sat straight up in bed at 3am, after tossing and turning for over an hour, and let out a big sigh and shuddered and said, “YUCK” loud enough to wake Royce up. He sat up and asked what was wrong and I remember saying, “Roach…can’t sleep…will get me…crawling up bed… grossed out…want to sleep…” and I remember him saying, “Oh, I’m sorry Sarah. But I did look for it with my flashlight and couldn’t find it.”

And I wanted to say, “It’s a ROACH! You aren’t going to find him with a flashlight! Did you pull everything out from under the bed and shake out all the blankets and sleeping bags and backpacks and sweep up all the dust and any other trash, clothing, toys, etc that might be under there?? What’s that you say? No? Ok then he’s still down there!!!”

But it was 3am and I was being dramatic enough.

Then I heard Claire fussing and it was 4am and I had to get out of bed. You can’t imagine my anxiety over it. I just KNEW I was going to STEP on that roach with my bare feet in the middle of the night!! OH! The anguish! It’s almost too much to even write about. I honestly couldn’t decide which was the lesser of two evils – staying in the bed by myself while Royce fetched Claire – and facing the possibility of discovering the demon on my own, or getting up and braving bare feet on wooden floors in the middle of the night with the demon on the loose.

I tell you – my phobia of roaches is so bad that I actually had thoughts last night of burning down the house in order to ensure that roach was gone.

But, obviously, I’m OK and I didn’t squash a bug in the middle of the night with bare feet and I wasn’t AWARE if he crawled on me last night.

However, we haven’t seen a sign of him – so I don’t know…I’ll probably be sleeping on the couch tonight. Or maybe Friend’s newly fashioned guest bedroom if it comes to that.